


i want you, more than i know

by jsernstonx



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Animals, Childhood Friends, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Jealous Clarke, Love Confessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-19 04:12:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13696623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jsernstonx/pseuds/jsernstonx
Summary: There’s also another feeling Clarke can’t quite place until—“You’re jealous,” Raven says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.What? "Why would I be jealous?""You're in love with him.""I am not in love with Bellamy," she says under her breath, but for some reason, that doesn't feel entirely true.or,the one where clarke is jealous of a cat





	i want you, more than i know

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Who_Needs_Reality](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Who_Needs_Reality/gifts).



> happy valentine's day meha <3

The thing is, Clarke had never thought of Bellamy Blake as anything other than her friend; best friend, to be exact. From as far back as she can remember, he's been the one constant in her life.

He was her first friend; when his sister put gum in Clarke's hair, he was the one to help coax it out with peanut butter which was gross, but it worked. He taught her all about the constellations and she taught him how to swim. He was her first kiss too; when she fell off her bike he kissed her forehead and told her she was going to be okay. Her actual real first kiss didn’t come until much later though and was with a girl named Glass in tenth grade — her lips tasted of sweet mint lip balm.

But then Bellamy got a girlfriend, or so Clarke _thinks_.

And, well—

"He threw up on me! It took me four washes to get it out of my hair.” Clarke gathers up her hair and pulls it down over her shoulder, grimacing. “And _then_ had the nerve to ask for my number.”

Bellamy snorts. "That's disgusting. Your love life is a disaster."

“And yours isn’t?” she challenges him, teasingly. “Anyway. I would just like to erase this entire day from my memory, thanks.”

"There's only one way to do that." Bellamy gestures towards her almost empty beer, "Want another one?"

" _Please_."

He gets up and heads towards the bar while Clarke finishes off her beer.

It's not that Clarke means to read Bellamy's message, but the light from his phone on the table catches the corner of her eye and she can't help but look—

 

 

**Can we meet @ 8pm tonight instead?**

 

The message itself is pretty innocent and vague, and she wouldn’t think anything of it—if not for the number being under a _heart_ emoji. She frantically searches her brain trying to remember if Bellamy has mentioned anyone recently and maybe she just forgot, but nothing comes up.

"So," she starts as he sets their drinks down and settles back into his chair. "Do you wanna order some food?"

Yeah." Bellamy picks up his phone and swipes it open, tapping out a reply—with a _huge_ fucking grin on his face. "Actually I can't. Rain check?"

Before Clarke can even form a reply he's on his feet, jacket in hand and pressing a light kiss on the top of her head. "See you later."

It takes Clarke a moment to process what just happened. With her in the middle of her residency and Bellamy working on his first novel, it's safe to say that their schedules can be hard to align sometimes, but their weekly catch-ups at the Dropship are something of a ritual. And Bellamy just blew her off, for someone else. Worst of all, he didn't even offer her so much as an explanation. He just _left._

And there's a sudden sinking feeling in her stomach.

 

*

 

The following Friday Clarke's all but forgot about the message she saw—deciding that if it was someone important in his life, Bellamy would have told her already.

"I brought snacks," Clarke shouts as she strolls into Bellamy's apartment, arms full of bags. Since Miller is sleeping over at Monty's, they decided to forego the Dropship and spend the night at his instead.

He rounds the corner, hair wet and shirtless, and Clarke just stares—mouth slightly parted. She's always known he's insanely hot, but lately, it has been _distracting_. "Hey," he says with a devilish smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "You're early."

"I finished work earlier than I thought." It comes out more breathless than she intends. "I picked up some food and just headed straight over."

"Cool. Let me just throw a shirt on."

 _Is a shirt really necessary_ , she thinks. God, she really needs to get laid.

She's in the kitchen opening two beers when he reappears. "So, a movie?"  

"A movie sounds good, yeah." He peers into the bag from the opposite side of the counter. "I'm not sure I want any of this though."

"Hey." Clarke pulls the bag out of his reach. "Strawberry peanut butter sandwiches are the perfect snack for a movie."

He screws up his face but relents. "Do you want some help?"  
  
"No." She shakes her head. "I'll make the sandwiches and you can choose the movie, but no documentaries this time."  
  
He leaves her to it and goes to choose something for them to watch.  
  
When the sandwiches are done she follows him into the living room, places the snacks on the coffee table and falls down next to him and snuggles into his side, head on his chest. "You're my favorite, you know? Like my absolute favorite person in the whole entire world."  
  
He laughs, wrapping his arm around her and kisses the top of her head. "You're mine, too."  
  
There’s a moment half-way through the movie when his hand covers hers and their fingers intertwine and her breath hitches and something feels different, but then she wakes up in the morning on the couch with a blanket draped over her, alone.  
  
She pads her way into the kitchen to pour herself a cup of coffee when she notices the note stuck to the refrigerator:

  
  
_Had to go out, not sure when I'll be back._  
_Help yourself to food and hot water,_  
  
_Bellamy_

 

And then she remembers the text message and she can't help but think he's hiding something from her and, yeah, she really doesn't like that one bit.

 

*

 

A few days later Clarke corners Monty next to the vending machine at work, "So."

"So," he repeats. He's crouched down working on the fuses.

"You're over at Millers a lot, right?" Miller is Monty's boyfriend who also just so happens to be Bellamy's roommate. "Has Bellamy been weird?"

"You mean more than his usual weird self? I'm not sure I understand the question, Clarke."

She sighs and then, "Has Bellamy got a girlfriend?"

That gets his attention, he looks up at her, a brow raised. "How am I supposed to know that?"

"You're his friend," she says defensively.

"You're more his friend than I am." He must see sense her unease because he adds, "Look. I haven't seen anyone at their apartment, if that helps, and I'm sure if Bellamy had a girlfriend, you'd be the first to know."

But that's what worries Clarke, she's not so sure she would be. At least, not anymore. "Yeah, thanks."

"No problem, pass me the wrench will you?"

 

*

 

Her brief talk with Monty did nothing to reassure her, so her next stop is Raven because Raven always knows just what to do.

Raven is another one of Clarke's friends and also Bellamy's. They didn't become friends in the most conventional way—her finding Raven screwing her boyfriend who also, simultaneously, just happened to be Raven's boyfriend wasn’t pretty, but they ended up tossing Finn to the side and became instant friends after that.

They’re at their local coffee shop during Clarke's lunch break and Raven's telling her about a guy at work who she likes and who keeps asking her out— _Zeke_.

"So why don't you just say yes?"

"Because Clarke, we've gotta keep them on their toes," Raven smirks. "Why are you brooding?"

"Bellamy has a girlfriend." Raven looks at her as to go so she tells Raven about the text message and about how he keeps disappearing on her, " _And_ he didn't tell even tell me he had met someone let alone that he has a girlfriend."

"He didn't tell you?"

She can't help but feel hurt – they tell each other everything, or at least, that's what she thought.

There’s also another feeling Clarke can’t quite place until—

“You’re jealous,” Raven says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

 _What?_   "Why would I be jealous?"

"You're in love with him."

"I am not in love with Bellamy," she says under her breath, but for some reason, that doesn't feel entirely true.

"Sure you're not," her friend rolls her eyes. "Clarke, you guys have been in a relationship for years just without the sex and the love confessions. Maybe you both were too blind to see it, but we all did. So stop brooding and say _something_ already."

Clarke considers that—the possibility that she might be in love with Bellamy and _fuck_ , maybe Raven's right.

"But his girlfriend-"

" _If_ he has a girlfriend. You're basing this all off a vague text and his suspicious behavior. Bellamy's Bellamy, he's always suspicious. Talk to him."

"We're getting drinks tonight so I'll talk to him then," she decides.

A couple of hours later she’s in the middle of painting when her phone beeps. She wipes her paint blotched hand on her shorts and picks her phone up.

 

  
**Hey, so, about tonight**

 

  
Three little dots appear alerting her that he's typing out another message but Clarke finishes it for him—

  
  
**ure bailing on me**

 **  
**  
The dots disappear for a second but then,

  
  
**I promise I’ll make it up to you.**

  
  
**u better**

  
  
It's short and abrupt but she's annoyed. He's fucking blowing her off again and most likely for _her_. She tosses her phone on her bed and goes back to painting only cursing Bellamy when the stroke of her brush on the paper doesn't quite go as she plans.

 

*

  
After that, they make plans to meet at Clarke's favorite art Museum but he doesn't show up, and she waits for three _fucking_ hours before she gives up and leaves. Granted she could have called him, but she wants _him_ to want to spend time with _her_ and from the past few weeks he's giving her a different vibe.  
  
She hates this.  
  
She hates him.

No, she _loves_ him.  
  
And she _hates_ that she _loves_ him because if she didn't it wouldn't hurt as much this.  
  
She desperately tries to flag down a cab from the sidewalk but after ten minutes of no luck, and seething with anger, she decides to confront Bellamy. His place is only a fifteen-minute walk from the museum, she didn't even realize it was raining until a woman in Bellamy's apartment block scolds her for " _dripping water all over the place_ ."  
  
When she storms into Bellamy's apartment she's greeted by Miller. "Where is he?"  
  
Miller points towards the hall and without another word she heads towards his room.  
  
The door swings open and there's a thud when it hits the wall.  
  
"Hey," he says when he turns towards her and then, realization crosses his face. "Oh, shit. Clarke I forgot. Listen-”  
  
"No. _You_ listen asshole. I don't know what I did to deserve-”  
  
And just then his phone chimes and he has the nerve to actually _look_ at it.  
  
"I've-"  
  
"Got to go," she finishes for him, her tone bitter and cold. "I'm not even surprised. Have a nice life with her, Bellamy."  
  
"Wait," he grabs her hand—stopping her. "What's going on here?"  
  
"You have a girlfriend!" She blurts out. "And you didn't tell me. I'm supposed to be your best friend, Bellamy, and you didn't tell me—more than that, you lied about it."  
  
"Girlfriend? I don't have a girlfriend, Clarke." He looks genuinely confused.  
  
She scoffs. "You've been blowing me off for _her_ for _weeks_ . Missing our Friday nights, disappearing, not showing up and being all suspicious."  
  
"Fuck Clarke—you mean Bree?" He runs a hand over his face. "That’s the cat adoption lady."  
  
She's just about to tell him that she doesn't care what her _fucking name is_ when the second part of his sentence registers.  
  
"Wait. _What_ ?"

"I found this website online for a cat orphanage and all the cats just looked so sad, you know. There was this black cat--Betsy," he gives her a sheepish smile. "I contacted the lady in charge and she's been helping us get ready for the transition. They are surprisingly thorough."

"But her number was under a heart emoji—"

"It was also under a cat heart-eyes emoji," he adds, a hesitant smirk on his face. "I'm already in love with her–she's the softest most purest little ball of fluff I've ever met. It was supposed to be a surprise. I wanted to surprise you."

Oh, _oh_ .

"Oh my god," she blows out a breath. "Are you telling me I've been jealous of a cat this entire time?"

"Yeah, I guess,” he shrugs. “But if it helps she's not the only girl I'm in love with."

"So, just to be clear—you're not talking about a second cat here or maybe even a dog? I _really_ need you to be clear right now."

"How about," he reaches up and tucks a strand of her hair behind her ear and then leans in, "I just do this."

His lips press gently against hers but just as she's about to press back harder—

—he pulls back, and she whimpers at the sudden loss of his lips on hers and tries to chase his mouth but then, “Just so we’re one hundred percent clear, I’m in love you with, Clarke Griffin.”

Her heart does a little flip. "I'm in love with you too, idiot." She wraps her arms around his shoulders and kisses him, more deeply and desperate than before and he groans into her mouth.

"I really wanna keep doing this–” He whispers against her mouth a moment later, he sounds nervous, _it's cute_ Clarke thinks. "But Betsy is waiting and the adoption lady is really strict on being on time."

She laughs lightly. "Okay. Let's go get her."

**Author's Note:**

> I aimed for angst, but what can I say? This was just a bucket full of fluff ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


End file.
